MalcolmRosenthal.com
Well, I was wandering around the web last night when I ended up on my own website. Funny how that happens sometimes. Anyway, I was sort of poking around, and I noticed two things: (1) this website is really, really cheesy. (2) this website is outdated, obsolete, arcane, and, well, old. I mean, how many educated readers and writers do you think stop by MalcolmRosenthal.com on a daily basis. If we put up one of those hit counter things, it might say something like YOU ARE VISITOR 05 TO THIS WEBSITE. And the funny thing is that at least four of those visits have been from me. How many stories have I been sent over the years? Well may you ask. Like the number of visitors to my site, there are 5, and 4 of them are by me. The fifth was sent in by Noel Cropper (bless his satanic little soul), who was nagged and forced by me, probably at gunpoint, to send in whatever he could (By the way, it's not a bad little story). As you also can see, Mr. Cropper has been the author of the week (a position that changes, you guessed it, weekly) for at least two years. Also be sure to check out the sentence of the day, which now holds the world record of being the sentence of the day seven hundred and thirty days in a row. In short, this website is no longer relevant (not that it ever was), and because of this simple fact, it is now being retired. "What did you say?" I hear you calling, "You are retiring this beautiful example of the internet at its best?" Yes my friends (Or friend, since unless I become schizophrenic, the only person ever to visit this site is probably going to be me), MalcolmRosenthal.com is about to change forever. "What," I hear you cry, "is going to fill the empty cyberspace that was once this superb website?" And a good question that is too. MalcolmRosenthal.com will undergo a supreme metamorphosis. The website for educated readers and writers will wrap itself up in an cocoon, and emerge as the official website of the Random Monkey Film Company, the next generation of MalcolmRosenthal.com (probably just as cheesy, but with cool Flash™ effects). You may ask yourselves "What is this Random Monkey Films thingy?" This is another good question, but to answer that (and also to perhaps answer the question "Why an armadillo"), you'll just have to visit this site again in a few months, and make yourself visitor #6 to my humble web abode. Since there now remains nothing of this website but the page you are on now, I have taken up temporary residence at the adress of xanga.com/Arken. Visit me there to find out what's going on with the production of the new and improved MalcolmRosenthal.com So, enjoy your stay, and be sure to come back real soon.